Trendy love requires a price
The concept of love is changing with each passing day, and the way of love has become various.
“Joint venture love”, “signed love”, “platinum combination” and other marriage models bring us new ideas, but also brought a series of reflections on love-“Joint venture love”, how much does it cost?
In the economic society, some of the working partners become married couples, and some couples choose to start a business together. Such love is called “joint venture”.
”Joint venture love” can be said to be “a success is also Xiao He, a failure is also Xiao He.”
When two people are good, they think in one place, and move in one place, occupying the right place and the right place.
But once hit by the wind and grass, “common love” will become fragile and even vulnerable.
The following story illustrates this somewhat-falling in love with the boss Chen Ming is the main person in charge of a company, and Miss Bichen is his capable subordinate.
The relationship between the two is no longer a secret in the company.
Although Bi Ling pays attention everywhere, he does not let his colleagues feel that he is “deceiving others with bullies”, but every time there is a conflict, he will be the target of private discussion.
If you change a company, you can also become the boss’s right arm with Bijie’s ability, but in this company, everyone thinks she has the “vase of kung fu” to stand out.
Female colleagues looked at her sideways, and male colleagues looked away from her.
It wouldn’t matter if she was able to settle down on the status quo, but she is also a hardworking and strong person who wants to make achievements at work, so she is very painful about her embarrassment in the company.
She thought about changing another company, but Chen Ming tried to stay with her again, making her a dilemma.
Suggestion: If your love partner happens to be your boss, and you don’t want to enjoy it under his umbrella, then your right choice is to switch jobs: to another unrelated department, or simply to another companyjobs.
Otherwise, such “office love” will do more harm than good to the development of career and relationship.
Falling in love with the customer Ms. Yi Min is the backbone of a network company and is responsible for the business of several major customers.
In one or two contacts, Mr. Fang, the head of a major client, fell in love.
After their relationship was exposed, they were also sensitive to the pressure from the company.
Originally, the relationship between the company and the customer was a two-way choice. It was also normal for the order to run.
But after knowing that Yi Min is Mr. Fang’s girlfriend, her company believes that Mr. Fang’s company has an “obligation” to purchase their products, and if something goes wrong, as long as Yi Min comes forward, everything should be resolved.
Even when the company made a mistake, he also asked Yimin to persuade Mr. Fang not to hold him accountable.
However, when Yi Min put pressure on Mr. Fang, Mr. Fang felt very unhappy.
Once love is connected with interests, it has to make people doubt its purity.
Mr. Fang even suspected that Yimin’s interaction with him at the time was “impure”, which made Yimin furious, and the two ended up breaking up.
Through this incident, Yi Min found that his choice of love turned his career from Yangguan Avenue to a wooden bridge.
Suggestion: Yimin could have done this: First, have a serious dialogue with the manager of his company, and make sure that he must not confuse career with love; second, let the company’s colleagues gradually take over the business with Mr. Fang, all the detailsThe problem itself will no longer appear, so that not only can the public and private be clear and peaceful, but even if the relationship between Yi Min and Mr. Fang hits the ground in the future, it will not cause too much damage to Yi Min’s career.
Working for her boyfriend Xu Qian’s boyfriend started a small advertising company. Xu Qian started working for her boyfriend after graduating from school.
There are not many people in the company, and a few of them are part-time, so most of the usual people in the office are Xu Qian and her boyfriend.
Boyfriend is still in the early stages of entrepreneurship, so sometimes it is unavoidable.
After encountering setbacks, the two men frowned together, and after work they didn’t have the heart to go out to HAPPY as before.
After this first and lasting adjustment, the two broke up.
Xu Qian concluded: “Putting love and career together will make life easier.
There is also a factor effect: when I was looking for a job again, I found that during the time I was with him, my work experience was basically blank. I did not learn how to work well in the company and how to deal with colleagues.Interpersonal relationship.
All in all, except for a failed relationship, I have nothing to gain.
“Suggestion: Don’t work for your boyfriend even if you are in love.
Leave his company and find the starting point of your career in the outside world. Don’t let the work set cover your emotional set.
The above cases of divorce without separation are still lightweight in “joint venture” love, and the damage caused is not particularly great.
But Kaifeng and Zhang Man are different. They were college classmates and started their own company after marriage.
Just as the business was getting smoother and smoother, the relationship between the two people had problems.
When they chose to divorce, they discovered that the company they co-founded was more problematic than their children.
Kaifeng’s name was used for company registration.
If the two are separated, it means that Zhang Man will also leave the company.
Even if the company’s assets are evenly distributed, the company legally belongs to Kaifeng.
Zhang Man didn’t want to give up, and didn’t have the courage to start a new business. Of course, she didn’t expect the changed man to take the initiative to give back half of the company, so she could only choose a marriage in name.
Suggestion: The women in this case often have a very high level of knowledge and working ability. They set up a business together with their boyfriend, but find that when the relationship is in crisis, the career building is about to collapse.
At this time, no matter how regretful it is, there is no use. All measures are to “make up for the dead sheep” and minimize the loss.
Negotiate with the other party first to fight for the best interests, at least to obtain part of the company’s assets to compensate for their hard work and time spent over the years.
”Platinum”, its profit breaks gold?
Zhao Zhao, a well-known columnist and known as the “spokesman of the petty bourgeoisie”, in his book “Female White Collar Gold Husband”, openly proposed that the marriage pattern of “Female White Collar” to marry “Golden Husband” is the forefront of society todayThe most realistic and perfect marriage model.
Zhao Zhao said that all “female white-collar workers” should marry “golden husbands”, and all “gold female husbands” should marry a “female white-collar workers” to go home as wives. This is the door of the new era.”Perfect love”.
After reaching this conclusion, Zhao Zhao also pointed out more specifically that in this new era of “door-to-house pair”, the door biology between men and women must not be the same, and the man should be higher than the woman, which is the most capableA gateway relationship that is accepted by both sexes.
A recent survey from Guangzhou on the income and quality of life of couples seems to confirm Zhao Zhao’s point of view.
According to investigators, among couples aged 25 to 45, husbands earn twice as much as their wives, and exchanges between them are often replaced by substitutes for husbands and wives, and the quality of life also clearly overlaps.
From this, the investigator came to the conclusion that the optimal income ratio between husband and wife is 2: 1, which is the “balance point” of good marriage quality.
The mystery of stable marriage is that the man makes twice as much money as the woman?
Is this economic external factor really the key to the quality of marriage?
In China, although women’s income is generally higher than that of their husbands (women are only about one-fifth of the total), the overall situation is similar, which indicates that the economic growth of Chinese women is relatively high.Men’s dependence also varies.
However, if the husband and wife earn twice as much money as their wives are the most stable according to the views of the scholars and scholars above, does that mean that women should not go too far in terms of economic independence?
If it is true that the wife earns half less money than the husband and the marriage is the best, as the above survey says, then if the woman wants a stable marriage, she has to consciously stand aside in her career. She cannot earn more money than her husband; If you show your talents in the workplace, if you show your skills and accidentally earn more than your husband, your marriage may be affected?
It is undeniable that the “high male and low female” in the relationship between the sexes is a reality in reality.
However, this existence does not imply that it can be immediately contradicted: “high men and low women” will produce a harmonious and balanced gender relationship.
The evaluation of “high male and low female” is based on the inequality of men and women, and is itself a product of inequality.
If calculated according to the couple’s income of 2: 1, wouldn’t a successful woman only be able to marry a big boss who has more money than her to be happy?
If the income of the wife can only be equal to that of the husband, wouldn’t it be said that men are superior to women, and that strong men and weak women can become the best ending in a marriage?
On the surface, “Platinum Combination: Female White Collar + Golden Husband = Perfect” is an equation, but in fact, it is an inequality.
Today, the number of “female white-collar workers” is much larger than the number of “golden husbands”. If you have to follow this formula, why are there so many “golden husbands”?
In fact, a wife earns more money than a husband, can also create a happy marriage, and even change the couple’s income ratio from 2: 1 to 1: 2.
Husband and wife are everything as long as they love each other, and money can only be used as an argument.
What determines the happiness of marriage is not whether it is a combination of “female white-collar workers” and “golden husband”, but whether the two sides are like-minded and have similar interests; whether they are striving for the same goal for the same purpose.
How did this original novel become so extreme and incomprehensible to some literati and scholars?
”Sign love”, what do you sign for?
”Signing Love” has become popular among some trendy people.
The purpose is to use a paper agreement between the two to ensure that love does not change for one or two years.
The contracting provisions include that neither party can fall in love with a third party, cannot betray the other party, and so on.
The emergence of “signed love” precisely reflects the era of love: short, fragile, and always insecure.
This is an era of freedom full of temptation. Love may seduce away at any time. The land and the wildness and eachother cause both naive and off-beat beats.
We are unable to fight against it, so well, let us pass a paper agreement to at least guarantee the loyalty caused by this covenant. From a certain perspective, it seems that we can see women’s maturity and independence, and their relationship with men is equal in “signing love”.
It should be noted that in the traditional concept, if the contract period has expired and the contract is no longer “renewed” or married, the woman becomes increasingly older and she is at a disadvantage in the marriage market.
And the same height hardly exists in men.
Therefore, women who dare to sign a love contract with men should be women who are independent in all aspects.
This is the positive message we see from this contract.
But is it really an ideal choice?
In my opinion, this is still a helpless choice, but also an irrational helpless choice.
Emotion is a psychological activity. Whether a man or woman continues to love one person and whether he loves another person is not subject to the contract.
Is it an inhumane imprisonment if you love something else in the contract and cannot love it, or you no longer love this person but cannot leave?
Is it different from our ideals on gender relations?
Is it different from the humanistic and free beat of this era?
In this way, the significance of the signing is questionable.
Feelings are gone, what are the constraints of a contract?
With this, we might as well not want this contract, but just sign an agreement in our heart: if there is no love, you can leave at any time!
You are well-prepared for thinking, and you will be better able to cope when things change.
If he (she) is leaving, let him go!
There is always someone in front of you.
Without the agreement on paper, maybe we can make this relationship easier.